The Captain speaks! And no, it’s not exactly “We’ll Win Tonight” bulletin board material.

Instead, Rangers captain Jaromir Jagr has decided to speak to the Post’s Larry Brooks about his contract situation, which will see him hit the free agent market this offseason unless he improbably records 26 points in the team’s final 13 games and leads the team to a first round victory in the postseason.

According to Jagr, he doesn’t want to be a distraction to the team, but he’s going to go ahead and talk about his contract anyway. He says he doesn’t want his future to be an issue, so he’s going to tease everyone with cryptic remarks while refusing to elaborate in any meaningful way.

Confused? You’re not alone. Via the Post:

“I know it’s almost impossible for me to get to the number I need to get my option year, and I’m OK with that. I’m OK with becoming a free agent if that’s what happens. My focus isn’t on how many goals or points I get, it’s on doing whatever I can to help this team win.”
…
“I have a pretty good idea what I’m going to do next year, and I’ve known for three or four weeks, but I’m not going to say anything. I don’t want that to become an issue,” Jagr said. “I’m not going to say something that’s going to be a distraction to the team.”

Well guess what, Jags? You just became a distraction.

Listen, the media in New York is not easy to navigate, and I have to imagine it’s even tougher for a non-native speaker like Jags. But that said, what’s this guy thinking? What could possibly be gained from granting these exclusive quotes to a reporter from the Post? It only takes a little bit of thought to avoid pitfalls such as this, and yet professional athletes seem to continuously tumble head-first into them.

Now, instead of talking about Henrik Lundvist’s Mike Richter impersonation yesterday afternoon, we’re talking about contracts and free agency on the eve of another critical matchup for the Blueshirts this evening.

O Captain, my Captain.