Now that the NBA has gotten what it wants with the Lakers playing the Celtics in the finals, I’m stuck trying to figure out who I want to win. After many minutes of careful reflection I realized I was looking at this problem from the wrong angle. The real question is, “Who do I want to lose?”

When it comes to sports, New Yorkers are practically honor bound to hate all things Boston. I don’t know if there’s anything more agonizing than sitting in a bar in the East Village with a bunch of members of “Red Sox Nation” cheering during the World Series. Until recent years we didn’t have to deal with that problem – the Bosox just couldn’t get it done in the playoffs. Now they’ve won two World Series in the past four years and their fans are everywhere.

O if it were just baseball! The Patriots have been ransacking the NFL’s trophy cabinet for a decade and the only thing standing between this “Dynasty” being regarded as the best team ever is their head coach’s willingness to cheat to win (High five to the Jets for not just tarnishing the Patriot’s image, but for forever burying it in the muck on the Hudson’s riverbank. Did I mention that the damage is not ever going to go away and that people will forever refer to these Pats as cheaters? I mean till the end of time forever).  

Now the Celtics suddenly spring onto that lame fake parquet floor and are the best team in the NBA? We all watched it happen in the offseason… first they added Kevin Garnett, then Ray Allen appeared through some worm hole, what’s next? An alien? Bam! Here comes Sam Cassell off of the bench. What the hell is this? Of course they stormed through the NBA regular season. Look at that lineup! And they’re in the Eastern Conference. Lame. There really wasn’t ever any doubt the Celts would be in the finals.

When it comes to cities, Los Angeles is the polar opposite of New York. We’re gritty and hard working. They’re all smiles and boob jobs. Breakfast for us is a coffee and a cigarette. Breakfast for Los Angelinos? Non-fat mocha latte frappucino with whipped wheat grass. New Yorkers live on top of each other- we take trains and buses to get around. Los Angeles is sprawled out so far they don’t even know where it ends. Californians drive everywhere in sports cars. Here in New York, everyone has a story. There, everyone just makes one up. Two totally diffirent mind sets exist between the two biggest cities in America and the one over in SoCal makes me want to puke.

The Lakers seem to thrive off of the glitz. It’s like they somehow took a little of that California sunshine and used it to line their uniforms. Glamourous. High Flying. Celebrities everywhere at their games. Yup, the Lakers might as well be rock stars. I can’t get past Kobe Bryant’s whiny offseason though. He went as far as flying to Italy to meet with Jerry Buss to demand a trade. He went public. He belittled his teammates. No one had the goods to bring him out of LA so he stayed. Now that his team is in the finals, Kobe loves them. I saw him on Sports Center talking about how he can’t wait until Andrew Bynum comes back from his injury. I think Kobe loves Bynum not being there. If the Lakers win now, it’s all Kobe. He gets the credit and the spotlight. If they lose he points to the bench and says, “we’ve got injuries.” Never mind that it wasn’t so long ago when Kobe was recorded bashing Bynum’s value. Check it out. It seems to me then that Kobe has taken on some of the personality of Los Angeles.

Both Boston and New York have East Coast pride. The Knicks and The Celtics are in the same division in the Eastern Conference. What it all boils down to is that we as New Yorkers have more in common with Boston both on and off the court. Am I saying you should be cheering on the Celts? Not so much. Just embrace the “team” that is the Celtics over the “me” that is the Lakers. Regardless of who you pull for though, this looks to be a great series and if I were a betting man (and I am) I wouldn’t even think of putting a dollar on either of these teams. This one’s too tough to call at the moment.