The New York Rangers surprised the Montreal Canadiens with a birthday present to help celebrate their 100^th season – the gift of playing like crap. With a who’s who of Rangers and Canadiens legends looking on, the Blueshirts disgraced them all. Les Habitants flew by the Rangers, for a 6-2 slaughter.

Everything that happened on Wednesday vs. Pittsburgh? Strike it, and reverse it. That night, the Rangers played a completely solid game – hitting, taking care of the puck, skating, forechecking. If the Pittsburgh game was a test that they passed, this was one where they earned an F. We’ve seen this game before, against Florida, Vancouver, Ottawa, and we shouldn’t have to see it again. It was an absolute turnover-fest. The whole team stood around like statues. They couldn’t clear the puck out of their own zone. They didn’t hit anybody. They poke-checked their way around the ice. Knocking over a body in front of the net? Forget about it. There were wide open Canadiens in the crease all game. If it weren’t for Henrik Lundqvist, the score would have been 12-2. He was left out on an island all on his own. And he was pissed. And he should have been.

The Canadiens turned into the old Flying Frenchmen, skating around the Rangers like they weren’t even there. Montreal out-shot them 39-20. Scott Gomez was –4, Markus Naslund was –4, Dmitri Kalinin was –3. At least Blair Betts had an excuse – he was scratched with an “upper body” injury. And Wade Redden left the game with a “lower body” injury. Bunions? Gout? Leg fell asleep? Who knows. He should have left long ago with “bad performance/won’t hit anybody” syndrome. Will we finally see that much-needed seventh defenseman now? Aaron Voros spent part of the game in Tom Renney’s doghouse. But there is no doghouse for the D, because there are only six of them. No matter how poorly they play, they all know they’ll still be in the lineup.

The only highlights: Nigel Dawes (playing because of the Betts injury) scored a goal after some impressive stickhandling by Nikolai Zherdev. The Rangers actually scored a power play goal (Naslund). And Petr Prucha and Gomez dropped the gloves (though not with each other; and technically, Gomez got a four-minute roughing penalty).

The Rangers can’t just lose routinely. Every defeat has to be a nightmare – either an embarrassing blowout or embarrassingly blowing a lead. Guy Lafleur and Henri Richard were there last night, and the Rangers made every member of the 2008 Canadiens look just like them. It’s just too bad the Rangers don’t have anybody that looks like Brad Park. Because they sure could use him right now. Next game: Sunday night at 7:30 vs. Calgary.

Bag-O’-Knuckles-O-Meter

Colton Orr: 6

Aaron Voros: 5

Paul Mara: 3

Brandon Dubinsky: 3

Ryan Callahan: 1

Petr Prucha: 1

Marc Staal: 1

Nikolai Zherdev: 1