The Giants’ transformation from an elite NFL team to ineffectual mediocrity is astounding. Against the Saints, the defense was the culprit; against the Cardinals, it was the offense; but yesterday against the Eagles, it was every aspect of the team that was horrible. The Giants are misfiring on all cylinders. Alarms are sounding, and people are running to the panic room. Are the Giants in a slump? Or are they a bad team? Whichever the case, they’re looking pretty ugly these days, and I mean Oakland Raiders ugly.

Right now, the defense can’t stop anybody – or anything. If a stray dog ran out onto the field, it would run right by the 11 men on defense and score a touchdown. Johnny Damon would go wild against these guys. Not only wouldn’t they be covering third base, they wouldn’t cover home plate either. The Giants certainly miss Kenny Phillips, Aaron Ross, Michael Boley and Chris Canty, but do they miss them that much? They’ve given up so many points the last three weeks, I thought I was watching the beginning of the NBA season. Is Mike D’Antoni their new defensive coordinator? “There were a lot of times all you can do is throw your hands in the air and wonder why,” said Justin Tuck. Giant fans everywhere are wondering why, too, Justin. “There’s a reason, and we need to find it out.” You have one week, now get going.

On the offensive side of the ball, Eli Manning is turning into an interception machine, and when he’s not throwing picks, he’s tossing the ball 20 feet over a receiver’s head. Are they running bad routes or is he just stinking it up right now? Is his foot affecting his eyesight? And when the Giants were behind by, oh, 90 points, in the third quarter, there was absolutely no urgency by the team. They were happy-assing their way to the huddle and line of scrimmage, and then handing off on every play while time quickly ticked away. Were they even trying? They could have at least pretended like they wanted to win the game. Sure, the one-two punch of the shredded D and Manning’s INT put the game into garbage-time mode within minutes of the opening kickoff, but where’s the competence and discipline? Where’s the effort and fire?

The Giants are disappointing us all right now. They’re slacking off and not playing up to their potential. Tom Coughlin needs to start acting like my father. Should he call them a bunch of idiots and take away the car keys? Ground them until they’ve learned their lesson and start playing the way they’re capable of playing? Kick their ass because they’re ruining the family name? However he does it, he needs to find the answer and find it fast. There’s still half a season left, but they’re sinking like a stone in the standings. How did they get so bad so quickly? What happened?